You don't need to be snarky about it.
It runs fine on VDMSound. The issue is that the game simply is timed in the typical awful manner of old DOS programs, and runs TOO fast. I thought I made that clear.
And given the choice between playing the game at an unplayable (or at least extremely annoying) framerate by running it in DOSBox, and running it in a playable manner but with slightly weird music by using VDMSound+dgvesa+Mo'Slo, I choose the latter. And it's not as if I didn't try fiddling around with the DOSBox settings or anything, I've done that plenty of times before and know what I'm doing for the most part there, and tried messing with the config to a reasonable degree to get it working as best I could, which turned out to be not good enough.
I'm running XP Pro 32-bit on a relatively P4 laptop at 2.8GHz with 2GB of RAM and a crappy Intel integrated graphics card from about 2004. I've actually been trying this on someone else's computer as well, which isn't any better and has less RAM, some sort of junky Celeron, and I think the same line of Intel graphics.
But yeah, the only issue with VDMSound is the speed, which is easily fixed (for the most part; it's hard to get the game ever running at a perfect rate on even an ideal machine since the load changes depending on in-game circumstances) except for the problem of the music getting slowed down too.