Here are some more pictures, hopefully hi-res enough.
As we can see, we're dealing with rev. 1.2 here.
I set the CLK jumpers to 1-2, but same result (no boot).
I appreciate the power hack, but I'd rather not roast the CPUs that much.

What happened to the screw attaching "Q2" to the heatsink?

I took out the voltage regulators for testing and I managed to get the screw out, but putting it back in was almost impossible due to the other heatsink being in the way. I attached the regulator to its heatsink with thermal glue.