Anonymous Coward wrote:

Where can I get one of these flowcharts to help navigate around all the BS conversations started by extroverts?

What exact flowchart and what exactly do you wish that it covers? I can google and see what I can find, yet I need something concrete and specific, in order not to link to the wrong information.

DosFreak wrote:

I can't speak for the topic except every time I see that word I think of the South Park episode. ;) […]
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I can't speak for the topic except every time I see that word I think of the South Park episode. 😉

As far as people with issues go....

Highly detail oriented. I've been troubleshooting my whole life so I see that all parts make a whole. Most people aren't like that and get annoyed which annoys me because their laziness involves more work for me and even worse when I'm part of a project and I'm not the one in charge so the laziness tends to bite us in the ass later. Story of my life.

Simplicity. I buy the bare minimum and furnish bare minimum. No crap sitting on cabinets or dressers. Clutter annoys me and it's extra work down the road.
Highly organized. Not OCD level or anything just that I'm known for it. So much so that if someone notices I have a couple of items out they comment on it.

Social. People annoy me and always have. Crowds stress me out and give me headaches. I watch people so I know what I need to do to avoid them or not annoy them. It took me a lot of time to learn the flowchart game when engaging in conversation. I've figured out over time the random BS conversation you need to engage in to not seem strange and at what interval. This takes ALOT of effort so most of the time I'm in "minimum effort" mode and then if I have to go "full effort" then I do so and then I'm done. i.e. Show up to the meeting, party etc for 15m act normal (aka think Dexter) and then get the hell out. I've always been confused why people do the things they do which I eventually figured out that people do this crap to give their meaningless lives meaning instead of doing anything meaningfull. Award ceremonies, Religion, Rituals, etc all convoluted BS. People do notice that I'm off but I don't give a crap. I live alone and always have. I don't feel like I'm missing anything since the alternative would be excruciating. I don't play multiplayer since I don't condone idiocy and I don't like my time wasted. Most time spent multiplayer was back in the BBS and LAN gaming days.

Anxiety - My dad takes medication for this but he doesn't like the effects so he doesn't. I haven't been diagnosed or anything but when I was a kid I would repeat actions and as an adult I catch myself doing so at times and stop myself.

Risk - I'm pretty risk adverse and take a lot of time to make the right decision which most people do not do. People comment on this. I would comment back but then I wouldn't have very nice things to say heh. So no sports or crazy athletic activities (Just standard running and walking) . I do make quick decisions when it doesn't matter so I'm not like that guy on the Good Place.

I've been the same way since I was a kid and I'm not young but still have a lot of years left assuming I don't get hit by a bus.

Detail,Simplicity likely came from my upbringing since I didn't have much growing up and I'm a loner so spent a lot of time reading and figuring things out
Anxiety,Social issues are both nature and nurture since I'm sure there is a genetic component but also I moved around a lot and parents didn't do much with me for socialization since they both worked. My younger brother and sister don't have these issues but they never moved around a lot and I was the test case so they knew what to do with them.

All this to say that I don't think I'm much different than anyone else we are all messed up in different ways. It's the "normal" people you have to watch out for.

Your description seem to be a lot similar to how I would describe me. Impressive.

I'm introverted and have some Asperger's-like traits (such as shutting down at social gatherings due to overwhelm), but I wouldn't consider myself on the spectrum. My son is diagnosed with Asperger's but is atypical in that he is very social, and even thrives in social gatherings. Where he's more typical is in not understanding when he's being made fun of (he's sure they're "just joking" and laughs with them). Also, very slow processing speed and poor working memory, but can have incredibly intelligent conversations with adults in topics that he obsesses on.

AFAIK for the definition of autism it is a lot about inability to deal with change, in general. ( Yeah I know Aspergers is not the same. )
Every person has their limit in that regard. I have my limits as well, but that is fine.
Other then that the allopathic medicine business including psychology is just a shadow of what it is supposed to be, or what it pretends to be. So whatever they define is just that: their definition of another "thing" that can be managed instead of cured. Or even better: prevented.

Nobody is the same, and some may be born or grown with irreversable impracticalities. Which is no coincidence, and very regrettable. But for many I think diet/food, Lifestyle, Faster EFT and some actually sensible advise may do wonders. With diet/food and Lifestyle I mean back to natural old-fashioned things, instead of modern fakery.

My 2 ct.

When having aspergers, you kind of struggle with changes just as much. The degree of the spectrum, determines how well you can cope.

As an example. My daughter have Aspergers, and just changing seats in the classroom can have a one week impact on her. She need to have things explained as well, way in advance. Group work in the class one day a week is a big no-no as well. She need the school week to be the same every week.

Routine and predictability are the key in her case.

Another thing. Now that christmas is around the corner. No more than 2 gifts from each person and no more than around 6 gifts in total. That is what she can cope with. Else she gets a melt down. Two years ago, she melted down, after number 8. On the other hand, she will get more expensive gifts this way. My son on the other hand, who have Autism, can never get too many gifts. For him it is heaven to get 10 gifts in total from everyone.

I think dealing with change is also something not necessarily related to autism/asperger.
Introverts in general will probably be likely to want to overthink a situation first, and generally do not like to 'improvise'. So they prefer something of a 'warning'.
In the end perhaps it all comes down to some 'social contract' about what people expect of you in a certain situation, and people wanting to meet such expectations (which I don't think would apply to autism/asperger as much, I'm not sure to what extent such people would be occupied with others and their expectations). If the situation changes, then so do the expectations, and if you're not sure what people expect of you in that situation, you may fear that you will make mistakes, embarrass yourself, let others down etc.
It also seems that people have more difficulty with change as they grow older.
Then again, I've also seen extroverts who have trouble with change.

Indeed, some people take it to extremes, and they actually 'shut down' because of it, and can no longer function.

Scali wrote:

I think dealing with change is also something not necessarily related to autism/asperger. Introverts in general will probably be […]
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I think dealing with change is also something not necessarily related to autism/asperger.
Introverts in general will probably be likely to want to overthink a situation first, and generally do not like to 'improvise'. So they prefer something of a 'warning'.
In the end perhaps it all comes down to some 'social contract' about what people expect of you in a certain situation, and people wanting to meet such expectations (which I don't think would apply to autism/asperger as much, I'm not sure to what extent such people would be occupied with others and their expectations). If the situation changes, then so do the expectations, and if you're not sure what people expect of you in that situation, you may fear that you will make mistakes, embarrass yourself, let others down etc.
It also seems that people have more difficulty with change as they grow older.
Then again, I've also seen extroverts who have trouble with change.

Indeed, some people take it to extremes, and they actually 'shut down' because of it, and can no longer function.

Yet, there are a difference between shutting down and getting nerveous. 😉 Worst case is change leading to what "normal" people see as freaking out.

I can only recommend the youtube channel called "The Aspie World". The host of the channel, are really one of the best to explain these things, in a way that people can relate and understand.

brostenen wrote:

Yet, there are a difference between shutting down and getting nerveous. 😉 Worst case is change leading to what "normal" people see as freaking out.

Well, I just wanted to say that the individual traits attributed to autism/asperger may not necessarily be unusual on their own.
I think it's the combination of these traits, and also the specific context.
Even 'normal' people do 'freak out' at some point, generally in situations where they feel loss of control, leading to frustration, anger, and eventually 'freaking out'.
I guess what makes autism/asperger different is that they tend to go from 0 to 100 in under a second. There's no filter, no warning.

Scali wrote:

Well, I just wanted to say that the individual traits attributed to autism/asperger may not necessarily be unusual on their own. […]
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brostenen wrote:

Yet, there are a difference between shutting down and getting nerveous. 😉 Worst case is change leading to what "normal" people see as freaking out.

Well, I just wanted to say that the individual traits attributed to autism/asperger may not necessarily be unusual on their own.
I think it's the combination of these traits, and also the specific context.
Even 'normal' people do 'freak out' at some point, generally in situations where they feel loss of control, leading to frustration, anger, and eventually 'freaking out'.
I guess what makes autism/asperger different is that they tend to go from 0 to 100 in under a second. There's no filter, no warning.

Exactly what is happening. As fast as a nuclear bomb. The worst is low function infantil autism. I have seen a couple of those in october to december in 2001.

One was that the person did not have a full glass of milk when the plate with food was served. That resulted in the person got so frustrated, that the staff at the place were scratched and hair was pulled. Another was that the person began screaming because the person had to walk 12 times around the table, each time the person entered the building. Yet the conflict was that the person was used to start the coffee machine each time the person took out the kitchen trash, and the kitchen was before the living room. Normally the person was able to wait with the walk around the table. Yet not that day. The person freaked out and did the screaming 1 out of 4 times. Yet the persons routine was to take out the trash every day, after lunch. So it was a constant conflict, because the person still had the routine from when the person lived at home at that persons mother.

Now that is low function infantil Autism.