If there is already a thread about dumb things you have done to your vintage hardware due to, but not exclusive to naivety, ignorance, bad taste, bad vision, double vision (which is not necessarily redundant with bad vision as I am able to see bad things twice), flashbacks, anxiety, tremors, twitches, temper tantrums, diarrhea and/or constipation depending on what pills you took last night, smoking too many cigarettes for too many years or any other bad or good habits depending on how you view the world then excuse me for starting yet another one. I will post here and just talk to myself to blow off steam, which is fine, since I really do like to stare at myself in the mirror since I am so dashing and described as truly handsome by ladies at least twice my age.

Please, all those who are too smart to make mistakes sit this one out. You can compensate for all the small things in your life elsewhere. Thanks a bunch!

My dumbassery wizardry knows no bounds when it comes to hardware I'm not completely familiar with. Combined with an excellent dose of hyperactivity and attention deficit disorder the world is my oyster that wont open.

So let me start with this wonderful deal on a DVD-RW optical drive I found at a local thrift store.

I knew I was in for a treat since it was $5 and had no specific company logo or manufacturer's name on it. You can imagine my excitement heightened even more when I powered it up and it announced itself as...

Booted up Windows 98 and put a CD into the drive and... nothing. It tried and tried to spin that disc, but it just couldn't muster up the strength. I quickly opened it up and found a mysterious white ring just sitting there at the bottom of the drive blocking any disc that crossed its path.

What could this be? Maybe it goes on the bottom? No, doesn't quite fit. Then it must go on the top. Let me also make up the reason it is needed. To cushion the disc as it spins ferociously in the drive so it doesn't break apart on reentry. Glad I solved that puzzle.

So the only way to make sure this magical white ring doesn't fall away from it's host is to super glue the damn thing on. Make sure to apply enough or it could just fly away. Just one more squeeze and that should do it.

There, that's not going anywhere. I better wait for a few hours to make sure it sets properly and is rock solid stuck so no force of nature can remove it.

The night sky drops down like a curtain and I decide it is time to enjoy the rewards of my hard labor and ingenuity. Windows boots, the drive opens, I put a disc in the tray and push the button that closes said tray and... it only goes in halfway. If I was trying to create a wonderful prank DVD drive this would be an excellent specimen, but unfortunately I really want it to go fully in. Over the next few hours of cursing and admiring my knack for dumbassery I start researching what removes super glue. This, of course, is after picking away at the now not so magical white foam ring that looks suspiciously like a corn pad for an unhappy foot. It appears that acetone would be my answer if it wasn't for the fact it likes to eat plastic. So I settle in for the night on a nice comfy chair and cozy up with some fine grain sandpaper and sand away the super glue until the plastic disc underneath was smooth like a serene lake hidden away from all the nuances of technology.

Sigh.

Anyway, the story has a happy ending, I did get most of the glue off and it now spins happily ever after. That drive and I had a long talk into the night after all that drama. A thrift store, five bucks and some super glue. I'd call that a pretty cheap date with a happy ending.