Flatulence bug solving solution..

A fart a day keeps the wife at bay.....

Burnt Capacitor/Magic Smoke scented deodorant.

• Make mandatory to include B+UEFI (BASIC+UEFI) on every motherboard. So any computer (even servers!) can boot to BASIC like 8 bit home computers. To ensure compatibility, that BASIC should be Sinclair BASIC (with all features like numbered lines).
• Flat panel monitors with round corners like old TVs. Bonus if they're slightly curved.
• Also 12 inch or smaller BW monitors (or green or ambar, if you don't feel nostalgic enough).
• USB cases for full height MFM/RLL hard drives (look! 10Mb in such a small space!).
• A post-it printer: you can write your notes, print them and attach to your monitor's case.
• A password generator that directly print to your post-it printer.
• A flat panel monitor with 5 inch plastic borders, to you can attach your postits (old CRT displays were better for that task).
• A mouse that builds-up static electricity and shocks you every 30 minutes to avoid getting asleep.
• A mouse that randomly moves every 3 minutes to show computer activity. Note that the mouse must phisically move, if that was done using a program it would be detected. Bonus if the mouse also clicks your screen randomly and screws your work.
• A monitor that can be controlled (bright, contrast) putting your hand next to it (like some car screens).
• An adaptor to use your typewriter as a keyboard.
• Remember that USB things that reacted to MSN notifications? Just make more a bunch of these that connects to your phone via bluetooth.
• Also, a google/alexa assistant with the shape and size of that Zoltar machine
• Now that CD/DVD burners are being phased out, vinyl and VHS recorders should be available. Bonus if they're used for data storage.

I remember when I was child that I played for hours with my ZX Spectrum +. It was attached to a 12 inch TV , that produced enough heat to warm a cat... cats can't rest above a flat monitor, so a heated stand would be a valuable addition.

How about a Graphical User Interface with curved corners on it's windows...and a new start up sound. Could be a best seller....

How about an old video card company return announcing a PCI video card in the 2021? No wait.. this happened.. 😁

A portable SIMM, DIMM, SDR/DDRx multiple sockets ram tester with a built-in memtest like feature and a monochrome display that gives the progress info and errors. 😀

Zup wrote on 2021-08-05, 09:50:

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• A post-it printer: you can write your notes, print them and attach to your monitor's case.
• A flat panel monitor with 5 inch plastic borders, to you can attach your postits (old CRT displays were better for that task).
• A mouse that randomly moves every 3 minutes to show computer activity. Note that the mouse must phisically move, if that was done using a program it would be detected. Bonus if the mouse also clicks your screen randomly and screws your work.
• A monitor that can be controlled (bright, contrast) putting your hand next to it (like some car screens).
• An adaptor to use your typewriter as a keyboard.
• Now that CD/DVD burners are being phased out, vinyl and VHS recorders should be available. Bonus if they're used for data storage.

I thought I remembered a sticky note printer from the 90s, but looking for it turned up this modern one... https://www.amazon.com/Smart-Sticky-Note-Prin … a/dp/B08SZ26WF9

Also older LCDs had some pretty wide frames, pre 2006 or so.

There was a mouse wiggler as a novelty product oh and it's still a thing https://www.amazon.com/Liberty-Mouse-Mover-Bl … k/dp/B07P6HBD1N

Tablets and phones with brightness on auto can be inconveniently shaded by your hand sometimes resulting in brightness going dim in bright environment etc.

Typewriter keyboard mods have been done for IBM selectrics and similar machines.

VCR tape backup systems used to exist. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TUS0Zv2APjU

BitWrangler wrote:

I thought I remembered a sticky note printer from the 90s, but looking for it turned up this modern one...

I didn't know that things existed! Maybe they can be useful, after all...

BitWrangler wrote:

Also older LCDs had some pretty wide frames, pre 2006 or so.

About 1997 I was working on a IT department., and a coworker had a 23 inch CRT monitor. All the frame (and it was a big frame) was covered with post-its... and they were changing from time to time. I guess that we're still years away from that level of postit-display integration.

Most monitors has only enough borders to attach the panel (mine has 3mm borders), so a flat panel with 3 inch borders would be "a little oversized".

BitWrangler wrote:

There was a mouse wiggler as a novelty product oh and it's still a thing.

I remembered one of those alarm clocks that run away... so I imagined a mouse that moves by itself and you have to seek every time.

BitWrangler wrote:

Tablets and phones with brightness on auto can be inconveniently shaded by your hand sometimes resulting in brightness going dim in bright environment etc.

My thoughts were about the radio installed on a car I drove for some time. Having your hands near was enough to select another radio station, so I thought that a monitor with the same interface could be annoying (I use to point things at my monitor). A "touch panel" that reacts from having something near would be even more annoying.

BitWrangler wrote:

Typewriter keyboard mods have been done for IBM selectrics and similar machines.

I know of some electronic typewriters that have RS232 ports (to print, I don't know if they can be used as a keyboard)... nothing special. I was thinking to use a big, oily, noisy mechanical typewriter with the usual hard to press keys.

Zup wrote on 2021-08-05, 09:50:

• A mouse that randomly moves every 3 minutes to show computer activity. Note that the mouse must phisically move, if that was done using a program it would be detected. Bonus if the mouse also clicks your screen randomly and screws your work.

I had a user where I worked that rigged up a second mouse to sit on top of a flat piece of clear plastic which was on top of a clock.

The mouse would get a jiggle every minute when the second hand went past the sensor on the mouse.

This was after I blocked all the mouse jiggler programs.

386SX wrote on 2021-08-05, 11:14:

A portable SIMM, DIMM, SDR/DDRx multiple sockets ram tester with a built-in memtest like feature and a monochrome display that gives the progress info and errors. 😀

That exists. I've used a tech-bench device exactly like what you describe.

You can get such a thing at this website....

https://www.memorytesters.com/

Zup wrote on 2021-08-05, 09:50:

• Make mandatory to include B+UEFI (BASIC+UEFI) on every motherboard. So any computer (even servers!) can boot to BASIC like 8 bit home computers. To ensure compatibility, that BASIC should be Sinclair BASIC (with all features like numbered lines).

That's a genius idea. And to make it even better: this BASIC+UEFI needs to have built-in support for cassette tape drives as well, through use of the motherboard's on-board HD Audio chip and KCS or CUTS encoding.

And it explicitly needs to be tested and certified to work with 8-track tape recorders as well, for ultimate retro craziness! 🤪

Linux for the Desktop.

RetroGamer4Ever wrote on 2021-08-05, 20:01:

That exists. I've used a tech-bench device exactly like what you describe. […]
Show full quote

386SX wrote on 2021-08-05, 11:14:

A portable SIMM, DIMM, SDR/DDRx multiple sockets ram tester with a built-in memtest like feature and a monochrome display that gives the progress info and errors. 😀

That exists. I've used a tech-bench device exactly like what you describe.

You can get such a thing at this website....

https://www.memorytesters.com/

That's great I didn't really know this. 😁

Hardener spray for floppy disks

Navigation buoys for game ports.

Double Decker AGP bus (May not be compatible with PCI bridges)

Auto time,d punctu!ation ins.erter ?

Virtual memory RAMdisk.

BitWrangler wrote on 2021-08-10, 16:32:

Virtual memory RAMdisk.

That reminds me of those people that wanted to use a tape device as swap.

Other ideas:

• Make mandatory that every web page can be displayed on an VT100 terminal to be "HTML certified". That should include rendering every image and embedded video using ASCII art.
• Put more F keys on new keyboards, like F13 to F24 present on AS400 terminals.
• Cucumber shaped space bar on keyboards, to avoid cats typing.
• Reverse spam filter: only shows you spam messages.
• Reverse adblock: only shows the ads on web pages.

A box that makes a LCD look like a CRT.

Software hack to make the scroll lock key (who needs it anyway?) blink like the HDD light.

Joakim wrote:

A box that makes a LCD look like a CRT.

In fact, that would be very useful. CRT had some unique advantages when dealing with 8 bit consoles/computers, and usually supports very broad ranges of resolutions.

Joakim wrote:

Software hack to make the scroll lock key (who needs it anyway?) blink like the HDD light.

I remember seeing something like that...

Joakim wrote on 2021-08-10, 17:17:

A box that makes a LCD look like a CRT.

Heh I actually own one of those. https://the-gadgeteer.com/2017/05/25/double-t … etro-tv-viewer/ wouldn't have paid the $30 for it, but as a yard sale find I thought I might stick a small composite or RGB screen in the back of it to hook up 8bits to or something.

Zup wrote on 2021-08-10, 17:26:

Joakim wrote:

Software hack to make the scroll lock key (who needs it anyway?) blink like the HDD light.

I remember seeing something like that...

Yeah there's a few around http://www.myportablesoftware.com/scroll-lock-hdd-led.aspx and for numlock/capslock as well and for network and cpu load and other things.