So I spent a ton of time dealing with what seemed like random memory corruption. I suspected the external cache chips after much testing, and spent hours researching every 1990s-era tool to check and test cache. Cachechk, ctcm, cct386, speedsys, etc. Windows 95 was intermittently failing to load or process the registry. So I pulled the 4 chips (512kb) of cache and went to 8 chips (256kb). Same results. Then I went to 4 chips (128kb) and it worked - no issues!
It was after this point - many hours into the process - where the software-first brain in my head was looking for more ways to test cache chips. Even thinking of writing a program to do it. When I finally realized, HMM I wonder if this very nice TL866 eeprom programmer sitting next to me might have the ability to test chips. In what many on this forum would recognize as a blinding glimpse of the obvious - why yes it can test chips! So I popped them in one at a time and found one chip in the 512kb arrangement was bad, and 2 chips in the 256kb arrangement were bad. I just lucked out that the 4 I selected for 128kb were all good chips or I'd still be here pulling what remains of my hair out.
Oh, and the bus jumper had come off so instead of 33MHz it was 40MHz. Also not super helpful.
Long story long, I'll retest and post actual results when the new cache chips arrive. In the meantime if someone is having problems with their SRAM cache chips in the future - don't overlook your eeprom programmer! My actual SRAM chips were not listed as options in MiniPro but a different vendor with the same package worked fine.
IE instead of selecting my chip:
IS61C1024-15N = 128K × 8 SRAM = 1 Mbit
I used:
W24010 = 128K × 8 SRAM = 1 Mbit
Under 5 minutes to test all of them.